What Does Feeling Self Conscious Mean? 

Being self conscious is the perception that everyone is either thinking about or looking at you, even though this is rarely true. This is often called the spotlight effect. In fact, heightened self consciousness can cause you to develop anxieties about the most everyday social interactions. Here at CharisMe, we’re dedicated to helping you figure out why you might feel self conscious in some situations vs. others and what you can do about it. Keep reading to learn about our recommended tips to help you overcome self consciousness.

6 Tips to Help Overcome Feeling Self Conscious

1. Stop comparing yourself to others & embrace your uniqueness

We live in a world of ‘curated perfection’ where it’s very easy to form unrealistic expectations of others and therefore of yourself. The rise of social media has worsened this, but there are techniques you can use to deflect from social media overload. For example, when you feel the urge to compare yourself to others, why not try replacing this urge with another habit, such as reminding yourself of how good you are at something. Simple acts of self-gratitude naturally increase our self-confidence, releasing us from cyclical habits which may have undermined us in the past. 

2. Recognise and challenge negative thoughts about yourself

When you recognise yourself slipping into negative self thoughts, try to swap these negative thoughts with something that makes you feel good.  This could be listening to your favourite song, texting someone you care about or even writing down how much you have accomplished this year.  

3. Spend time with people who support you.

As obvious as it sounds, you are who you spend time with. So be mindful of the close friends and even family members you choose to socialize with. If you surround yourself with supportive friends and family, they will instinctively support you when you feel down. At best, they will gently make fun of your foibles instead of overly criticizing them.

4. Try something different & explore your adventurous side.

It can be easy to stick to the same habits and circle of friends, but a great way of breaking out of your comfort zone is by trying something new. Why not think of something you’ve never tried before? The something new could be anything: Going to a cafe alone; Attending a new meetup group; Mentoring someone or seeking mentoring in your industry. What’s wonderful about this tip is you will learn something new about yourself.

5. Other people don’t think about you as much as you think.

It’s important to remember that other people don’t spend as much time thinking about you as you imagine.  It’s largely a perception gap to assume that others spend X amount of time thinking about us.

6. Practise Self-Compassion.

Remember how optimistic and ambitious we all were as children about our futures? As children, we described ourselves in the brightest, most generous of terms. Try to be as kind to yourself as you were when as a child you imagined you could do anything. If you master the art of practicing self-compassion, there is pretty much nothing you can’t do.

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